how do i explain it?

i don’t wanna write here cuz i’m busy writing elsewhere. good god.

maybe i need another blog hiatus, until i am either angered or inspired enough to write here.

a farewell kiss

because we have to send him off right.

i figured these would hurt the most, no matter where they hit him.

links for the week of 18 january 2009

i’m etsy obsessed, so here’s some of the things i’ve found that make me REALLY happy.

from flytie, the babygirl gathered dress, sweet azul dress, and pop life sweater.

from sew sew suck ur toe, the frida kahlo softie! also, the dia de los muertos softie is awesome.

from my close personal friend mariam at the hand of fatima: a badass lariat necklace, the primp and proper necklace, & roses for claudia earrings.

go check out l’elephant rose! there’s going to be a sale on until the 20th, and all new stuff in the store on the 21st.

because i think renee at womanist musings is a freaking genius, i’m sharing her post about her moon time.

finally, a new post at the bliss project, called first things first. :)

perfect doesn’t exist.

yet i can comfortably say that i am perfect the way i am. every moment i change, i grow toward the light like a sprout. i am reaching upward continually.
striving toward my own satisfaction is what makes me perfect.
it centers me, gives me my reason for getting up each day, & will provide me with the legacy i wish to leave the world when i die.
i’m not here to lose, & quite honestly, i never have.

the plight of the fucking year:

how am i gonna be loved and sustained when everyone’s either trying to fuck me because it’s cute, or make me their healer?
i am fetishized
i am othered
i am dismissed
i am misunderstood
i am desired, yes
i am sexy, absolutely
but what of it when you’re trying to get me to explain to you what sex with a woman feels/ looks/ smells/ tastes/ sounds like when it’s not about that to begin with?
what of it when you’re whispering behind my back to other women that i “just don’t know what [i] want,” that i’m greedy or confused?
that’s the same thing as telling me i’m being picky while i’m in the middle of an allergic reaction to fish.

fuck.
how do i deal with the isolation that seems to come from being dedicated to being myself?
what do i do when all i want is to be held, and to trust, to kiss & touch & build without being put on stage (or on blast)?

some music, to lift our spirits.

the abundance mixtape by ppp (you may know them as platinum pied pipers). 

if you’re a fan of dilla, slum village, or any of the bling 47 stuff, you’re undoubtedly going to love this mixtape.
enjoy!

i am simply tired

of washing the blood from the hem of my skirt
not knowing whether it’s yours or mine
hearing the blood curdling screams of my ancestors as they overlap with the gritos of souls aching for justice & peace.
may the ancestors welcome you, adolph grimes.
may justice be visited swiftly upon those who snatched you away from this realm.  iba ara t’orun.
(and, for good measure, fuck the police.)

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