until she puts it up on blogger

i’m sharing with you dear readers a declaration posted by miss oyin on behalf of the buckwild family (just as adorable as the care bears & their cousins, but way more serious). a declaration of war, of sorts, against the kingdom of niggadom. after an experience w/ two of TKON’s most fierce warriors — women i work with, both of whom espouse SO MUCH PRIDE in black folk/ blackness, i felt it necessary to remind myself why i don’t subscribe to that school of “thought.”

Me and some otha membas of the Buckwild family have been chit chattin. We been doin some sharing of stories and some truth tellin and just some general vibin about the stuff that niggas get into.

How they abuse

How they manipulate situations

How they hurt us and themselves

All for The Kingdom of Niggadom!

And how no matter how enlightened a brotha is

At the end of the day

Should he choose to do so

He can lay all that to the side and post up in The Kingdom of Niggadom (TKON)

TKON is a terrorist organization. It is, among other things:

Anti-Freedom

Anti-Woman

Anti-Bliss

Anti-Peace

Anti-Cooperation

Anti-Truth

Anti-Erotic

TKON endorses the wholesale rape and destruction of womanhood. And it offers us either a pornographic cardboard cut out OR a whitewashed passionless virginal caricature to replace that destroyed womanhood. Now this don’t mean that TKON is necessarily physically raping a woman, (tho TKON isn’t above that either) cause TKON can be very subtle in its ways and workings.

TKON will have you to believe that your main purpose in life as a woman is to bear children and be a helpmeet of a nigga. And should you not want to devote your life to bein a helpmeet then something is wrong witchu, or maybe you’re a lesbian or perhaps you done picked up a evil spirit from yo woman friends: “Whatchu mean you dont feel free??? You be sittin up letting them women you hang around wit fill yo head wit all kinda nonsense. You betta watcho self or you wont neva have no manTHEN whatchu gone do? It say in the Bible that a womans place is . . .”

One of TKON’s favorite threats is that you gone end up in Hell, or even worse…old and alone.

TKON will have you to believe that the abuse that it hands out is really somehow all YOUR fault because you are too free, or too pretty, or too nice, or you smile at men too much or you don’t clean house the way that it should be cleaned or on the day that it should be cleaned, or because you don’t worship God the correct way.

TKON doesnt necessarily hit or yell, TKON is highly skilled in the usage of painful snide remarks and public humiliation. TKON will also withhold affection to teach you a lesson/punish you for not acting in accordance with the bylaws of TKON. For example, you may not get kissed hello because the house ain’t as clean as its supposed to be even tho TKON will NOT clean anything or pick up anything because that is womans work.

TKON promotes listening to your boys before you listen to anything that your woman or your mama tries to tell you because all women want to do is get over on you anyway or tie you down. TKON is the origin of the rumor that “she got pregnant on purpose.”

TKON likes the THEORY of a relationship with a woman, but actual intimacy without manipulation of some sort is usually beyond the capabilities of TKON.

TKON ultimately believes that if you don’t agree with it, its because you don’t UNDERSTAND it,

Cause you ain’t deep enough,

You don’t fast enough,

You don’t read enough,

You don’t pray enough,

You don’t watch the right tv shows,

You watch tv,

You wear yo stomach out,

You be temptin’ men

You haven’t read freud or jung

You straight

You gay

You dress too flamboyantly

You don’t own enough white linen

Yo jeans too tight

You got a perm

Yo hair is too nappy

You have locs but you don’t talk to them

Yo diet has too many carbs

Yo diet don’t have enough wheatgrass

You don’t eat no meat

You be burnin’ all that incense

You don’t neva burn no incense

Etc. etc. etc.

When grievances are brought before the court of TKON

1. TKON ignores the entire case because listening and being transformed by what is heard is outside of the capabilities of TKON

2. TKON will flip the entire scenario and make the entire incident/issue out to be some fault of the plaintiff OR circumstances surrounding TKON, because of course TKON is flawless in EVERY way and obviously anyone who doesn’t agree is crazed or should be in therapy or on some kind of medication

3. In very special cases, when TKON has cut to complete craziness and stayed crazy for a long period of time, TKON will institute surface level changes that will cause the plaintiff to believe that he/she has been heard. This keeps TKON in its position of comfort and power, with minimal effort. Note: these changes have a shelf life of 3 days-6 months, however based on our field research, the most common length of time is 2 weeks.

Sistas who have fallen victim to TKON typically react in one of two ways:

1. The denounce TKON and say fuck it and they mean it and they spit on the foundations of TKON.

2. They try to prove to TKON that they are a different kind of woman and therefore worthy of the love, affection, and esteem that TKON has on reserve for that perfect woman/queen.

I am a category 1 up in this piece. I say FUCK IT!

I SPIT on the FOUNDATIONS of TKON

LET THAT SHIT CRUMBLE!!!

I will get me a sign and picket outside the gates of that muthafucka

I am SICK and goddammit TIRED of NIGGAS WINNIN

I am TIRED of NIGGAS not bein held accountable for their actions

I am tired of Niggasebein put up on pedestals cause we scared of how they gone act if we worship at our own shrine instead of theirs

FUCK that shit

I am shootin TKON in the stomach and blowin air in the hole

I am breakin TKON’s fingers and wigglin em til he pass out or die of a heartattack

I ain’t keepin TKON’s secrets NO MORE

On THIS day in MY NAME, by the power of my womb, the power that I use to create the life that I love, I withdraw my ASE from The Kingdom of Niggadom

I am exitin’ stage left and takin’ up residence in The Town of Women

And I got my yam pounder cocked and ready for any muthafucka who feelin squirrely

When the men are ready

we can move to a new place.

But from now until the time that the dust settles on the destruction

I will shake my red tailfeathers in the general direction of TKON

And I will chant that shit down like they be chantin down Babylon

Num Yo Ho, No Mo Niggas Winnin © Beauchamp de Leau & Sugarlee Buckwild

I cordially invite all like minded persons (women in particular) to chant that shit down WITH me.

***Babylonian Sidebar***

we need to find us another name for Babylon cause in ancient times the chief problem that folks had with Babylon was the freeness of the women so I’m actually a Babylon SUPPORTER.

in the name of all that is on point & wonderful in the universe, i wholeheartedly second, third, fourth, and umpteenth that. shit.

Advertisements

3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. creatrix
    Mar 13, 2008 @ 22:40:00

    i STILL laugh my ass off every time i read “You have locs but you don’t talk to them” and “Num Yo Ho, No Mo Niggas Winnin”

    LOL

    this is a straight classic.

    Reply

  2. sparkle
    Mar 14, 2008 @ 00:15:00

    it’s gonna get printed out and put on my walls somewhere. because it’ll keep me from losing it when TKON does things like accuse me of growing up ‘rich’ because my mom never made me eat syrup sandwiches.

    *blink*

    Reply

  3. swirlgirls
    Mar 17, 2009 @ 16:02:00

    a late co-sign but this is gospel to my eyes. i’m chanting with you…i’m no longer held captive in their kingdom.

    Reply

Say Something.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: